I love you, Jennifer Bailey

I've been going through a really rough time in my personal life for the past couple of months, and while I don't feel it's appropriate to talk about the specifics of it here on the blog, I can't pretend it isn't happening. While I've managed to keep my head down and focus on what I need to do for the upcoming release of FREAK in hardcover and CREEP in paperback (both due out in August, and I'm proud to say I've met all my deadlines and will continue to do so), I have to tell you guys, I've had some really bad days.

Some downright terrible days.

And no, I don't see it getting better anytime soon. It's something that has to be worked through, and it will take as long as it needs to. I don't know what the outcome will be. I can only hope I'll come out of it stronger.

But the thing is – and this is the point of this post – I haven't been going through any of this alone. The absolute shittiness of the past couple of months has brought out the best in my friends, and if not for them, I would have sunk.

I'm not being melodramatic, guys. I would have SUNK.

I recently came back from a weekend trip to Boston where my two childhood best friends made damned sure I had a great time. And we did, so much so I'm wondering why the hell we came back. I have friends who text and call and check in with me every day, both here in Toronto and in Seattle, just to make sure I'm still breathing. Which means more to me than I can express.

And it's not just friends from "real life". My online friends have been great, too. If I ever doubted that online friendships were real, I don't now. Case in point – look what came for me today, all the way from California:

A care package! Filled with SO MUCH STUFF...

A notebook, for inspiration and creativity...

Fuzzy socks, for comfort...

A magnet, for laughter...

'80s music, for dancing and blowing off steam...


And soaps, hand sanitizers, sweets, chocolate, tea, and a magic wand for making wishes. Oh, and a lovely card, filled with lovely words to remind me of what's important.

All of this came for me today, all beautifully wrapped. A box filled with inspiration, comfort, laughter, dancing, calm, warmth, and most of all, friendship.

How did she know? How did she know I needed this?

But that's the thing with friends. They often know what you need, without you having to tell them.

I love you, Jennifer Bailey.

We met online, but you are as real a friend as I could ever ask for. You are everything I've done right in the last two years. I hope some day we meet so I can hug the crap out of you, and tell you face-to-face how much you mean to me, and how much you will always mean to me. I am so lucky to be your friend.

Do you have a Jennie Bailey in your life? Tell me about her (or him)!

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Posted by Jennifer Hillier on Thursday, March 01, 2012
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51 comments:

  1. There's nothing like getting a care package. I hope the bumps in your road are smoothed out soon! *HUGS*

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  2. Aw, I love Jennie! It is so wonderful to have friends around you that care about you. And they don't always have to be physically there. I hope things work out for you- I'm sorry you are having a hard time :( Thinking of you, Lady! Hugs from me and bunches of smooches :)

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    1. Thank you, thank you... we're lucky to know her, aren't we? :)

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  3. I'm sorry things are craptastic right now, but I'm so proud of you for staying afloat! That care package looks fantastic, by the way. It just goes to show you how much you are looooved. :)

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    1. Thanks, Carrie. I know I'm lucky to have friends who keep me floating. And you're one of them!

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  4. Awesome friend. And I know exactly what you mean about online friendships being absolutely real. The emotions and attachments are genuine. ((hugs))

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    1. Yes, the attachments are real! That's why I continue to stalk you. :) Just kidding. Hope you know how awesome I think you are, Luanne.

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  5. Jennie is an incredibly awesome chick, but so are you! Will say a prayer that things look up for you, though you're such a strong woman already I have no doubts you'll be back on top soon. I'm sorry about your hard times.

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    1. Thanks, Colene. I'm so glad to know you guys!

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  6. That was a wonderful gift!
    Jennifer, I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now. There is a season for all things and it won't last forever. But regardless, we're here for you. Some to support and listen. Some to amuse. I hope I can do both.

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    1. You already do, Alex. Thanks so much. And congrats again on the new release!

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  7. Hi Jenny,
    Actually, I have an online friend I chat with through Twitter mostly. Although she suggested/insisted/demanded I reach out during a particular rough time, I resisted. I felt in may be inappropriate to break down the virtual wall, being a married lady and all. I know my boundaries. I also know that she knows I think she's awesome. I know that she knows she can reach out as well if she ever needs to. Online friendships are real, although sometimes it's easy to dismiss them. I don't.

    And I adore Jennifer Bailey for brightening your day/week/month up, even though I don't know her.

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    1. Thanks for this, Charlie. Really. Email me, okay?

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  8. Things will get better. This will not last for long. You're gonna come out of this stronger than ever with all the confidence due someone as smart & beautiful & loving as you. I'm glad your friend was able to lift your spirits. We're all here for you. You have only to reach out. You know I'm only a phone call or text away. I'm gonna have to get your new address so I can send some love, too! Stay strong girlfriend!!

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  9. Now you've made me cry! I've said it before -- You get back what you put out. You are such an incredible person. You're getting back what you have put out there in friendship. Love you, girl! You're stronger than you think. And for those times when you feel like you're going to sink, let us hold you up. That's what friends are for!

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    1. Oh Jennie. Don't know what I did before you. Don't know what I'd do without you. You already how amazing I think you are.

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  10. That is the sweetest thing! Sounds like you have some incredible friends to help you through the rough days.

    I really hope things start to look brighter for you soon, I will keep you in my thoughts!

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  11. Hey, Jen - so glad to hear you've got great people around you. Like you, I have had several crappy days - actually months - especially last year, which was one of the reasons I'm not blogging at the moment - trying to stay upbeat on a blog is just too darned difficult. What's hedl me tvgether? God. Simple as that.

    I know he's got my back and the little things he's been doing in my life keeps on confirming that. Try and stay positive, and I know how hard it is. Sometimes it's simply difficult to simply get out of bed. My problems are professional as well as personal at the moment - yeah, not much fun. But I'm believing that great change is going to come this year.

    Best,
    duo

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    1. Thank you, my friend. Wishing you nothing but good things this year. You deserve it.

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  12. You two are adorable and awesome (adorsome?). I love it when blog friends know each other, but I didn't know you guys were this tight. I'm so glad you have Jennie B. to cheer you up, and I hope soon you won't be so much in need of it.

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    1. I'm lucky we found each other! I'm lucky, period :) Thanks Sophia.

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  13. I hope things get better for you soon. You've been under an enormous amount of stress with your books, and then the move, it's no wonder you feel the way you do. But spring is right around the corner. Freak is almost done, and you have friends like Jennifer Bailey. Take a deep breath and feel the love.

    I know you'll feel better soon.

    And thanks, I got the book last week.

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    1. Glad you got the book, Anne! Thanks for all your support always. :)

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  15. Jenny, I'm sorry you are having tough times, I really am. That care package looks awesome, though, and what a treat to know someone cares that much, took the time and trouble. Hang in there!

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  16. What a wonderful gift! Jennie really is the best. And so are you--I know you'll get through this tough time and be stronger for it. And know that we're all here for you. Thank goodness for good friends!

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    1. Good friends are worth their weight in gold :)

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  17. hey, how about a warning when you are going to be in Boston. I wouldn't mind getting your book signed.

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    1. You're in Boston? How did I not know that? What a great city, I'm sure I'll be back to visit one day soon.

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  18. That's so amazing! You have wonderful friends. I'm really sorry to hear you've been going through a tough time and I hope things get better. I'm happy to hear you have this support system, both in person and online. *hugs*

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    1. Thanks Ghenet. I so appreciate it. *hugs back*

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  19. I am sorry to hear that you are going through a rough patch. I will share this Suess quote with you its one of my favorites...."I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some from ahead and some from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles from me." I have an online friend names Stacey who I met through my blog. I call her my blog best friend or bbf. She really is a wonderful support and I couldn't live in this blog world without her. Good luck to you. I hope you have happier days real soon.

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    1. Glad to hear you have a Jennie Bailey of your own! Thanks so much for sharing that, Jennifer.

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  20. Ok...now I sort of feel like shit for not sending chocolates. I ate chocolate and I thought about you so does that count? No. No.

    You have so many peeps who love you and are your TRUE friends! Don't ever forget that.

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  21. Ack! Sorry you're going through such a rough time. I don't have a care package handy and wouldn't know where to send it, but please have a virtual extra-thick hot chocolate laced with Baileys and smothered in whipped cream and mini marshmallows, served with hugs.

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    1. Hot chocolate with Baileys and hugs? I'll take it! Thanks Ian.

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  22. That is so sweet! She's a keeper! (and they are rare)

    I hope you're days get a lot better... trying times are scary...but they let us see how amazingly strong we are in the aftermath.

    I'm cheering for you!

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    1. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? RIGHT? Thanks Casey.

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  23. that is so, so nice! I love online friends. they are the best! not sure what you're going through but hope it gets better for you soon and good on you for sticking to your deadlines. cyber hug!

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  24. Jennifer Bailey is one of the biggest sweethearts I know. I'm so sorry that you're going through a tough time!!! I'm sending you a gazillion calorie free virtual cupcakes! I'm so glad J.Bailey could step in and brighten your day. It truly is people like that, truly making the world a better place.

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    1. You make the world a better place, too, Jen. Thanks for being a great friend!

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  25. I know I haven't really said much, but I've been worried about you the past couple of months. I hope you're doing okay and I'm so glad to know that you're surrounded by awesome people who are taking good care of you.

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    1. Thanks Karen. I'm doing okay. I have a great support system, and that includes you. Hugs.

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  26. I'm still worried about you, hun. Let me know if you need anything, okay?
    Still, I'm glad you received so many nice things. (((hugs)))

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  27. So sweet! Jennie always seems to be spreading happiness on her blog. Hang in there and know that tons of people adore you (including me!), and we're rooting for your happiness. Cyber hugs! You rock!

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